What is one of the most challenging things that you have experienced or are currently experiencing?
“One of the most challenging things I have experienced was losing my daughter. That is something that took me on a downward spiral and it stripped me from everything that I knew and that I’m comfortable with. It brought me to a very empty place. It took years to find my way out of that depression. It happened six or seven years ago and it’s still hard, but it’s gotten easier. I found more strength, I found more healing on this walk that I’m taking. So yeah, it’s been my daughter.”
Tell me about that time in your life.
“Well I was eighteen, and the guy I was dating and I were planning on getting married and I found out I was pregnant. But when I found out that I was pregnant, I found out that he had gotten a relative of mine pregnant as well. And apparently everyone knew they were dating, and nobody cared to tell me. And it hurt me. It was then that I realized—well, I realized earlier in life—but it was then that I realized that you really can’t let your guard down. And sometimes, as sad as it is, it’s even with family members.
“I found out that she was pregnant, and when I was six and a half months pregnant I ended up losing my daughter. It’s been an uphill battle since. And I don’t speak to them. I don’t see any of my birth family really, and I moved all the way from Texas. Just trying to start over and find my own way and write my own story. And find my own healing without the opinions of everyone else.”
What was it like for you growing up with your family?
“I grew up in a very religious home. My father was a minister and it was very, well I don’t want to say strict, but it was a very Baptist church. No cutting the hair, no makeup and skirts, and you know, women didn’t really have a say-so in anything. I saw how that affected my home life. Even to today it’s very hard for me to voice my opinion. It stems back to my childhood and how I was raised, and you know I don’t speak. And that’s just that.
“My mom ended up walking out. I have seven brothers and four sisters, and my mom ended up walking out on us. It really took a toll. My dad got sick and my brothers and sisters and I were separated among different families. My dad was sick for two years. He ended up with a pacemaker, and we ended up moving. We ended up moving to this very small town, and I ended up getting raped there and I couldn’t tell anybody. I didn’t have that open door to talk to anybody, because it was so taboo to talk about rape and molestation. It was something I didn’t talk about for years and years. When I finally did, she said, ‘How dare you discredit this man!’ He was somebody well known in the neighborhood, and somebody everybody looked up to. It was then that I tried taking my own life. I tried drugs and alcohol, just anything to try and have some control over my own life.
“I’m twenty-five now, and from the age of ten to eighteen or seventeen I had been raped and molested my entire life. And I’m just now talking about it and telling people I know what it’s like to have no one to turn to, no one to talk to. I know what it’s like to be in this life, in this war, in this battle that seems so hard to conquer. I know how it feels to fight that alone. My outlook now is when people come to me and tell me they don’t think they can face tomorrow, I don’t think I can make it through this life, my thing is I tell them you can do it.
“It’s not easy, it’s not a bed of roses, it’s not going to be cupcakes and icing. It’s hard as hell, but you have to fight for your own freedom. You have to fight every single day like it’s your last day. And you have to make it count, because nobody on this earth is going to fight for your freedom like you are. Nobody’s going to fight for your healing like you are. And you know, we’re all fighting. We’re all fighting a fight that seems impossible. But when you step out of your comfort zone, you begin to realize you are not alone. You have a community of people yearning to say I know you, I get you, and we can do this together.
“You don’t have to feel alone. You don’t have to feel like your only option is suicide. You don’t have to feel like your only option is to go and do drugs. Or go out and party and try and forget your day and your life. It’s not the only option. You do have more options, you do have a brighter tomorrow, but you have to make the choice. I will go to bat for anybody who comes up to me and tells me, ‘I don’t think I can do this.’ I will fight with you because I know what it’s like. I grew up in a very huge family, seven brothers, four sisters, I have nineteen nieces and nephews, and I still felt like I was alone. I still felt like I had nobody in my corner.
“That’s why I feel like what you’re doing is so empowering. It prevents people from thinking, ‘I have to end my life because it’s never going to get better.’ If you give somebody an outlet to share their heart, they find healing in that. I think it’s so brave and courageous that you go out there and you say, ‘I want to know.’ If we had more people like that instead of just staying entrapped in their own little world in their own faith in their own religion as a reason that they cannot reach out to somebody, then this world would be much better. There would be a lot fewer lonely people out in this world.
“It’s not about the boyfriend-girlfriend relationship. It’s just about the human relationship. I don’t have to know you to know that I can talk to you. I have this problem; this is what’s going on and I need somebody. I can’t be afraid to ask for help. We can’t be ashamed. I lived in shame my entire life, and it almost killed me. I told one lady about being raped. From then on I never spoke about it again, because I felt like it was my fault. Now that I’m older I see that, you know, everybody always says everything happens for a reason. Bullshit. Not everything happens for a reason. There are sick people in this world, and they think, they do things, they take advantage of people. But that situation doesn’t have to define you.
“You can use that situation for your benefit to go and encourage people. And that’s what I want to do. I don’t want to sit in my own little world and say, ‘My life sucks, I’ve been through rape, I’ve lost my daughter, I’ve lost my fiancé.’ I want to go out to somebody and listen, because that’s what brings me joy in this world. My job doesn’t bring me as much joy. What brings me joy is going out to people and saying you can make this journey, you have a right to fight like hell for what you want, and I am with you 100%. No matter what decision you decide to make. You want to be gay, be gay, I am with you. You know I’m going to fight along with you, I’m going to encourage you, I’m going to make this journey with you.
“You want to never get married? I am with you, because as a human being we all have that right to make a choice of lifestyle. And it’s not my right to deprive anybody, and it’s not anybody else’s right to try to deprive me. I think we just need to come together. We all need to support each other no matter what race, ethnicity or religion. If we could all come together, I’m telling you this world would be so much better. We wouldn’t have to worry about a lot of this crap that we do worry about: judgment, being alone. Man, I can’t wait for a day like that.”
What do you think would bring us together?
“What would bring us together is putting aside our differences. Putting aside the fact, I know people to this day that are a certain religion and they will not speak to anybody else outside of their religion. Or who are against the whole gay marriage movement or won’t talk to people who are outside of their lifestyle. If you just put that aside for one minute and see that there is a bigger picture, it will change your life forever. Because I grew up thinking I can’t hang out with people who are gay, I cannot talk to people who are gay. And it wasn’t until my brother came to me and said, ‘I’m gay.’ There’s not a damn thing in this world that would make me shun him. So when he told me, I was like, ‘I’m done. I can’t do this. I can’t live this lifestyle.’ Because here’s the thing, it’s easy, it’s so easy for you to say that you don’t accept a lifestyle when it’s not happening in your own life.
“If your whole life is just gravy, and everybody’s riding on the same train together and everybody’s on the same wavelength, then it’s really easy to say you cannot come over because we’re not on the same wavelength. It’s easy to do that. But when it hit home for me, it opened my eyes because I had never been exposed to that, and if I had been, it was like, ‘I’m sorry, I can’t talk to you.’ And I feel ashamed for myself for allowing myself to live like that, because I realize that I have missed out on friendships that could have been better than any friendship I’ve ever had. All because of what was ingrained in me as a child. So when my brother told me he was gay, I was like, ‘I love you. No matter what, you want a place to stay, you come over and stay with me.’ When my brother called me, he was crying, and he said, ‘Hannah, I don’t think I can live anymore.’ He said, ‘I think I am going to commit suicide. Dad doesn’t approve of my lifestyle, my other brothers don’t approve of my lifestyle. I don’t have anybody.’ And it was in that time of hearing him so broken, I realized that I did that to people. And that’s what hurt me. I made people feel like their life wasn’t worth it, and that is never okay to make somebody feel like that.
“So when he told me that, and he called me just so completely broken and alone, I was like, ‘I love you. I want you. I want you in my circle. The hell with everybody else, I want you.’ And I think that was a real turning point in my life into accepting people. We’re not all going to agree on the same thing. We’re not all going to live in exactly the same lifestyle. If we did, we would be one boring community. I think that is what freed me from a lot of stuff, of my childhood, was him. And he doesn’t even know it yet.
“I haven’t really had a chance to talk to him. He moved from Texas to California, which I think was probably the best move he could ever make. I am so proud of him, and I find my brother, even though he is my younger brother, to be somebody I look up to. He is somebody I would love to model my life after, because that is courage and that is strength. I mean, that takes one hell of a fight to live. You know, knowing that your own family can’t accept you, and they’re the people who are supposed to love you and help you through things. That is what I want to model my life after. And if anybody comes up to me and tells me, ‘Well, my faith does not allow me to do that,’ I would tell you to question, because your faith that is supposed to be centered around loving people and drawing people with love can’t allow you to love somebody that doesn’t live the same lifestyle as you, it just does not make sense to me. I don’t get it. And that is something that I want to share with people.
“So many religions have so many bad connotations to them. You have the Christian community—my faith is very important to me, I feel like my faith brought me through many things. In my childhood it was the one thing I could hold onto. And I look at people, and I’m like, don’t allow one, a few people to define the majority, because I know a lot of people who are Christians, who do love God, but they would give you the shirt off their back no matter what lifestyle you live. I feel like that’s what we need to get to. We need to be able to say, ‘I don’t care. You can be white, black, Hispanic, Asian, you can be gay, straight, lesbian, bisexual, I don’t care.’ We’re people. And people were created to be loved. We long for acceptance, we long for companionship, and we long for friendships. You can’t deprive somebody of that. I’m sorry, but who died and made you judge of the universe?
“I feel like I am in a completely different season in my life now. Who I was last year and who I am today is just so night-and-day different. Today I feel like I’m doing something right. I’m loving people and that is what I’m supposed to do. Last year, if you were to try to talk to me, I was completely different. It was all about me and my world and I don’t care what anybody else is doing, just leave me alone. And now I find purpose in trying to help people and in trying to help people heal, because we have a lot of broken people in this world. We have a lot of people who have seen some dark days. I mean, they have seen some shit. Just putting it out there. If I can help one person in my day, I would count that as the biggest blessing in my entire life. That’s what I strive to do, that’s what I’m living for, is to help people.”
What are some of the ways that you practice healing?
“For my own personal healing? I started talking. You know, when I was growing up, I didn’t have that privilege to just talk. I have found much healing in talking to people. Writing stuff down, and not being afraid to tell somebody, ‘Listen, you’re not good for me. I need to cut the cord with you. You’re causing havoc in my life.’ I have learned the beautiful art of letting go of unhealthy relationships. Whether you have been in a relationship with somebody for years, whether they are family, the closest friend, this year I have learned how to let go. We can hold on to relationships simply because they are our comfort zone, but sometimes holding on hurts a lot more than letting go. It’s kind of hard to let go, it hurts to let go of your comfort zone, it hurts to let go of those familiar surroundings. But it hurts even more to hold onto it and allow people the power to keep you in the same mentality of depression of anxiety, of not feeling good enough. That is detrimental. You can’t live like that. And holding on the people like that, that is what they bring. So I always tell people that letting go is hard, but it makes your life one hell of a battle if you keep holding on. I feel like you can’t find healing if you are holding onto people who are constantly telling you that you are nobody, or who are constantly telling you that you can’t make a decision without them, or constantly telling you that the decisions you do make are wrong. Because I’ve lived that life up until last year. I couldn’t even make a decision on my own without going to somebody and asking, ‘What do you think?’ I’m twenty-five years old, I’m an adult. So I say just letting go, writing stuff down. Not being afraid to talk about what you’ve been through, because somebody needs to hear it. Somebody needs to know that I face the same thing they are currently going through, and if they can make it then I can make it. I think everybody’s story is a beacon of light to somebody else’s life. If we can just get out of our comfort zone, our stories can go where we can’t go physically. I can tell my story and it can go to somebody else I have never met in my entire life. I think by not sharing your story, it does the community no justice.
“You want to see change, start talking. You want to see a change in your community, then start talking about stuff. Stuff that’s going to shake people to the core, stuff that’s going to make people feel uncomfortable. Before I used to hate stirring the pot, and now I live for it. Because when you talk about it and you start messing up the nest a little bit, people think, ‘Dangit, I never thought of that.’ And it’s going to be in their mind. They’re not going to be able to help it but to think about what you’re doing. That’s why I tell people, ‘You want to see a change? Then start talking.’ Ruffle up a few feathers. It’s okay, they’ll move on. It’s find, they’ll live.”
Did you find that people were listening? Were the people you wanted to listen willing to listen?
“It got to the point where the people I wanted to listen wouldn’t listen, and it used to hurt me. But it got to the point where I didn’t care if the people I wanted to hear me were listening or not. Because there were people who were listening that I didn’t even know about. And they found healing, which in turn gave me such gratification. You see, we get into this cycle of people we are familiar with, we want them to listen, we want them to understand us, and if they don’t, we stop talking about it. But those people, if you think about it, have grown up with you, they don’t really want to accept that you are an adult, you are coming into your own. They want you to stay this little kid forever, and who does no wrong, who is just perfect, you know, but that’s not the case. I’m a PK, I’m a preacher’s kid, I grew up in a very religious home, so talking about molestation and losing a child out of wedlock was foreign, and I was told to never speak about it ever.
“And I wanted their approval. But their approval no longer mattered to me when I found out that other people were listening who needed to hear what was being said. And I’ve gotten out of the habit of seeking other people’s approval. Especially friends’ and family’s. I will go to a complete stranger and tell them, ‘Listen, you can do this.’ Because that’s what matters. Your story doesn’t necessarily matter to people who don’t want to hear it. And if you let that keep you from telling it, then people who actually need it don’t find the healing. They don’t find that courage to speak up either. You take their voice away without even realizing it.”
What gives you the strength to keep going?
“I’ve realized that it’s not about me. I mean some people are like, it is about you. It’s your life. But it’s not about me. I’m finding healing in my own way and I find it my responsibility because I’m finding healing to help other people find healing. Last year was all about me. My attitude was, ‘Oh, you’re hurting? I don’t care. I’m hurting, but nobody’s talking to me.’ And it was that same mentality that got me to where I am today. Where nobody listened to me, nobody cared. I want to be that person who listens to somebody and cares. So when I talk to people, it’s no longer about what Hannah’s been through. It’s no longer about Hannah. It’s about how can I help you at this specific time. I found what I’ve been looking for for twenty-five years. I found my healing. So help me help you find that for you. And that’s how I live every day, really. It’s not about me. It’s not about my comfort zone. It’s not about what I’m comfortable with anymore. It’s about helping, empowering other people.” =
You mentioned that you’re on a journey at this point in your life. Describe what that looks like.
“I am on what I call a healing of the heart journey. For years I have kept things bottled up. And the last year I have really, well the past few months I kinda like allowed those hurts to come back up to deal with it. Because if you don’t find complete healing in something, every time somebody taps at that wound it’s going to bleed. We have to find complete healing. And that’s where I am at now. I have found complete healing. When I would watch a show that had anything to do with rape or molestation, I would cry, I would go into a deep depression. I couldn’t get out of it. Now I feel like I am better now, I am more healed now. If you are not completely healed, you can’t effectively help other people. And so that’s where I am at now, I am on a healing of the heart journey that has been one of the best things. I have allowed myself to say no to people. I’m not doing that, I’m taking care of Hannah right now. I’m dealing with Hannah’s problems right now. And that is why, in doing so, I can turn around and say, ‘You’re hurting, it’s not about me, I’m dealing with mine, I know where I’m at and I know where my healing is at, it’s not going to affect me. It’s not going to send me into a pit of depression. Let me help you.’”
So knowing your boundaries and your limits.
“Yeah, knowing your boundaries. Knowing your limits. I’m a people pleaser at heart, and I’ve learned just recently to say no. A beautiful, beautiful word, no. I cannot do that. I’m not going to push myself to do that, I’m not going to make myself tired. Last year I had a stroke. Completely just so stressed and bogged down with life and work, and they would ask me, ‘Hannah, can you work fifteen hours today?’ ‘Sure. Why not? Let’s do this.’ And that became a pattern. And I could feel myself starting to get sick, but I was like, ‘I can’t let them down.’ My health declined. I was a very active and very athletic person, and then I got sick. I had a stroke, and it completely just knocked the wind out of me. And it was then that I realized if I don’t start saying no to people, they’re not going to care if I’m not feeling good. They just want what’s done is done. I have to take care of me. Nobody else around me is. And I learned, no I can’t do that. I’ve learned to say, ‘I’m sorry, but you are going to have to ask somebody else.’
“And that’s all been part of this healing of the heart journey. Say, ‘No.’ Know your limits, know your boundaries. Don’t let people put more on you than you can handle. You’re not alive to please every person on this planet. You’re alive to live your life to the fullest of healing, of gratification. Feeling like from when you wake up in the morning till when you lay down and rest you can say, ‘Today I did something for Hannah and I helped somebody else out too. But Hannah got what she needed. Hannah got healed.’ And that’s what I live for. I live to see people walk in healing now. Because let me tell you, being hurt, it drains you. Living with secrets, and living with pain, living that pain that has not been dealt with, it hurts you. Now that I’m dealing with what kept me bound, I feel like I’ve never had more freedom and I’ve never had more peace in my entire life. I smile now, and it’s so genuine. I laugh now, and it’s so genuine. I’m not like, Yeah, I’m great, you know. Everything’s fantastic.’ No, you know, life sucks but today is great. Live one day at a time, one step at a time. Don’t think about tomorrow, don’t think about next week. Today is what I am going to focus on. I can’t help what tomorrow’s going to bring, I don’t know what tomorrow’s going to bring. But I’ll deal with it when I get there. Today was a beautiful day. And I’m at peace with that. I’m at peace with every decision that I made today. And that’s what counts.”
What advice would you offer to somebody else who is maybe not confronting their pain and who may be approaching a healing process? I think sometimes it can be scary for people to confront their wounds and to sit with them and take a look at them.
“Let me tell you. I have dealt with people who have not confronted their pain, and are not ready to. I would say allow them to go at their pace. Because, it’s like an onion, if you start pulling back those layers too soon, it’s going to damage them more than it’s going to help them. Allow people to heal at their own pace. Don’t try to pry answers from them. Don’t force them by saying, ‘Oh, you have to get healed right now.’ It’s a process. Just like it was a process in getting hurt, it’s a process in getting healed. And don’t feel bad if you see someone who has gone through similar things as you and they’re at a place of complete healing and you’re not. Don’t be discouraged by that, because we all heal at a different time. If you were to come to me last year and tell me, ‘Hey, tell me about yourself,’ it would have completely damaged me. It would have probably set me back more steps than anything. So I say allow people to heal at their own pace, but allow them to know, and give them the comfort in knowing that when you’re ready to talk, I’m always here to listen. Always. Because that’s what people need.
“They need that assurance. Especially people who have been hurt. They need that assurance that, ‘Hey I’m not ready now, but when I am, will you please be there for me?’ And be that listening ear. I think that’s how people get healed.”
Is it fair to say that that may be the first step in healing, having that sort of trust and knowing that somebody will be there when they are ready to talk about it?
“Definitely. When I was living in Texas I didn’t trust anybody. I didn’t trust anybody to tell them hey I need some gas, because you are going to go and judge me on something. I didn’t trust people. And I found somebody here in North Carolina who had been through some hell, and she just started spending time with me. She started telling me about her life, and in return she was like, ‘Hannah, I know you’ve been through some stuff. And, when you’re ready to walk this path, and I’m going to tell you now, it’s not going to be easy. There will be days where you will just sit and cry because you’re finally dealing with what you’ve suppressed all these years.’ And I’ll be honest with you, when I started talking to her, she let me know, ‘You don’t have to talk today. You don’t have to talk tomorrow, you don’t even have to talk next week. But when you’re ready, I’m here. Here’s my number.’ And when she told me that, she was really there for me when I needed her. That’s when I began to open up. And that’s when I began, it was a judgment-free zone. It was, ‘We’re going to get there together.’
“And I had never had that before in my life. I had never had a friend who was willing to walk with me. I was willing to walk with everybody else and put myself on the back burner, but I never had anybody who was willing to walk with me in that. And I think it’s important to find that person, or to be that person.”
"That’s what it really is—that willingness to actually go there with that person. Not just to say, ‘Well, I’ll see you when you get back.’
“And let me tell you, dealing with people in a healing journey is dirty. It’s messy. I won’t lie. There were days when I woke up and I was just like, I would express something to her about what I had been through, and the next day I felt completely drained. I felt like somebody took a vacuum to my soul, and just sucked every ounce of energy out of me. But today I can honestly say that it was so worth it. It was so worth it to confront it. And not keep putting it back.”
It made space.
“It made space. I tell people it made space for freedom, it made space for love and acceptance, it made space for all of these good things. I was so used to seeing all the bad that I automatically started seeing people and I’m like, ‘Uh-uh, they’re going to hurt me. I don’t want to build a friendship with you because you’re going to hurt me.’ It made space to build genuine friendships. And it’s been one of the hardest journeys I have been on, but one of the most rewarding journeys of my entire life.”
Do you have a favorite quote that you would like to share?
“What I say every single day when I wake up is, ‘Live one day at a time, one step at a time, one moment at a time.’”
What does that mean to you?
“To me, it means enjoy the now. Enjoy today. Like I said earlier, when today is over with, when I get home, I lay in bed and I say today was a great day. This went wrong, that went wrong, but at the end of the day this went right. Focus on what went right. Focus on what made you smile. Focus on what made you happy. Write it down if you have to. You can’t go back, no, but this happened. I might be having a crappy day today but this happened, and that brought me complete satisfaction, and happiness, pure happiness. And when I go back to that moment, I say I can make this journey, I can make today. Today I will live. I had somebody cuss me out, but today I will live. Because I had a crappy day at the beginning of that day, but at the end of that day I got home and I was like today is a great day. I know today will end well. So I tell people, don’t get ahead of yourself, don’t start thinking about next week, don’t start thinking about what you can’t solve, deal with today. Deal with what you can win today. Don’t try to heal all in one sitting. It’s going to take a process. I think living one day at a time has brought me to where I am today. Because I would get discouraged when I would see people living this life, and they are like oh I feel so great, like life is grand, like I went through this but I can totally live life. I mean there were days, I will be honest with you, when I was like, ‘I don’t want to do life today. I want to be a couch potato, binge Netflix, and eat hot pizza and Cheetos. That’s what I want, in my pajamas, I don’t feel like doing life.’ You don’t feel like doing life today? Binge watch Netflix. If you have the opportunity to call into work, do it. Because those are the moments you can look back on and be like I was in complete happiness.
“Your sanity and your health, your wellness, your overall well-being depend on it. Like today, like if I don’t want to go into work and I’m just like I need a Hannah day, I call in, I’m like listen, this day I am going to take a day for myself. Can I get that day off? You know, co-ordinate it, I tell everybody, ‘Coordinate a you day.’ Where it is, ‘What does Hannah want to do today?’ Coordinate a you day. It’s not selfish. It’s how you keep your sanity in a chaotic world. So I’ll call my boss and I’m like, ‘Next week I’m taking a Hannah day,’ and she’s like, ‘All right, let’s do this.’ People aren’t going to give you what you don’t ask for. So if you’re just constantly going, going, going, nobody’s going to be like, ‘Oh, she needs a break, let’s give her one.’ Because why? They have stuff to get done. You have to speak up. You have to find that voice, no matter how scary it might be, you have to find that voice and be like, no today it’s me. And that gets you steps closer to your healing. Because you realize you are important. You matter. You are precious. And that’s something that I wrote out on Facebook. I said in the process of helping everyone else, I forgot that I was important. So that’s what I am doing, I am taking time for me.”
It’s hard to offer something to people that you don’t have.
“I say take some you days. It’s not selfish. It’s needed. Self-care is important. Nobody else is going to do for you what you can do. If I’m hurting today, nobody’s going to know unless I say, ‘Listen, today is not my day, I need some time alone.’ We live in a world where they just want things done like this, popcorn, the popcorn effect. Pop it now, let’s do it, you know. Put it in the microwave. We don’t want anything to bake in the oven because we want it now. In two minutes tops. You just have to kind of disconnect yourself from that. There are days when I’m just like no social media, I turn my phone off. Of course I will send out a text and put it on Facebook and say, ‘Today is me day. I’m turning everything off. If you don’t hear from me today, I’m fine, but I don’t want distraction. I want peace today.’ And I do that maybe once a week, once every other week. Completely turn of social media, turn off my cell phone, unplug Internet, unplug the TV, it’s just Hannah. I make a pot of tea, get my journal out, but last year I never would have done that.
“And I’m finding that, yes, people are important, but you can’t give what you don’t have. So it’s important for you to get refreshed yourself. And I’m not ashamed anymore to take me days.”
It sounds like in the process of disconnecting from social media and all those other outlets that you’re actually connecting to the source, yourself. And sort of checking in, making sure you have what you need before you branch out and offer yourself to others. That’s important.
“It is very important. Everybody laughs at me cause they’re like Hannah you’re weird. And I am like listen I might be weird, and you might not like it, but I’m getting healed. And that counts.”
How has it felt to talk about these feelings and experiences with me?
“It feels great, because I know it’s going for a cause that is so much bigger than I am. And I try to look at the bigger picture now. You see, our perspective is like looking through a keyhole, we only see what’s in front of us. We only see this little piece, but when you open that door, there’s a huge room. I tell people this all the time, ‘Our perspective is like looking through a keyhole. But there’s a whole other world out there. And you kind of have to get like a bird’s-eye view on it.’ And when you realize that that’s not what life is, it’s not a perspective through a keyhole, you start looking at things differently. You start looking at like, this is for a bigger picture. This is for a bigger cause, this is for something that is so much bigger than I am. And I feel honored to have even just a little part in that.”
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